Quarter life crisis! Is this something you’re struggling with?

Feeling stuck in life, unsure about your career, relationships, or where you’re headed? 

It’s a common phase that many young adults go through, but it doesn’t have to hold you back. 

Let’s explore what a quarter life crisis is, when it typically occurs, and, most importantly, how you can navigate it using insights from me, a sports psychologist who specializes in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT).

What is a quarter life crisis?

A quarter life crisis is a period of intense soul-searching and stress typically experienced in your twenties and early thirties. 

It’s like a midlife crisis but hits earlier. Often around the time you’re expected to establish your career, relationships, and overall life direction. 

This phase is marked by a profound sense of uncertainty and self-doubt. Where you might find yourself questioning the choices you’ve made and the path you’re on.

During a quarter life crisis, you might experience a range of emotions. Including confusion, anxiety, and a sense of being overwhelmed by the myriad choices and expectations that come with adulthood. 

Common symptoms include a persistent feeling of being stuck, a lack of motivation, and a sense of disconnection from your passions and goals. 

You might feel like you’re not where you “should” be in life, leading to frustration and disappointment.

This crisis can impact various areas of your life, including your career, relationships, and self-identity. 

For example, you might have landed your first job after college. Only to realize it’s not fulfilling or aligned with your long-term aspirations. 

This can lead to feelings of dissatisfaction and a desire for change, but without a clear sense of direction. 

Similarly, you might struggle with relationships. Feeling pressure to settle down or start a family while still wanting to explore and grow as an individual.

Social media can exacerbate a quarter life crisis by presenting idealized versions of other people’s lives. Leading to comparisons and feelings of inadequacy. 

Seeing peers seemingly thriving and achieving significant milestones can make your own struggles feel even more pronounced.

From a sports psychologist’s perspective, specializing in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), understanding the psychological underpinnings of a quarter life crisis is crucial. 

This period often involves a clash between your internal values and external pressures. 

You might feel torn between pursuing what truly matters to you and conforming to societal expectations. This internal conflict can create significant stress and hinder your ability to move forward.

ACT emphasizes the importance of accepting your thoughts and feelings without judgment. Which can be particularly helpful during a quarter life crisis. 

By acknowledging your emotions and understanding that they’re a natural part of this transitional phase, you can begin to navigate this period with greater clarity and resilience. 

ACT also encourages you to identify your core values. And also take committed actions towards living a life that aligns with those values. Rather than being driven solely by external pressures or fleeting emotions.

In summary, a quarter life crisis is a complex and multifaceted experience. And it can deeply impact your sense of self and direction in life. 

It’s a time of significant personal growth and transformation, albeit often accompanied by intense emotional challenges. 

Understanding what a quarter life crisis entails, recognizing its symptoms, and applying therapeutic approaches like ACT can help you navigate this difficult period and emerge with a stronger sense of purpose and fulfillment.

At what age do you typically get a quarter life crisis?

Most people experience a quarter life crisis between their mid-20s and early 30s. Although this can vary depending on individual circumstances and life events. 

This phase often begins after significant milestones such as graduating from college, starting a career, or entering into more serious relationships. 

The mid-20s to early 30s is a critical period where many young adults face the daunting task of transitioning from the structured environment of education into the unpredictable and often overwhelming world of adulthood.

During this time, the pressures of making major life decisions can become particularly intense. 

Graduating from college, for instance, is a major turning point that forces many to confront the reality of their career choices and future prospects. 

The initial excitement of landing a job can quickly be overshadowed by the realization that the chosen career path may not be as fulfilling or aligned with personal passions as initially thought. 

This can lead to feelings of disillusionment and a deep-seated urge to reevaluate one’s direction.

Similarly, social pressures and comparisons play a significant role in triggering a quarter life crisis. 

As friends and peers start to achieve traditional milestones, such as getting married, buying a house, or advancing in their careers, those who feel they are lagging behind might experience heightened anxiety and self-doubt. 

The constant exposure to others’ achievements, especially through social media, can amplify these feelings and create unrealistic expectations about where one “should” be in life.

Another factor contributing to the timing of a quarter life crisis is the clash between societal expectations and personal aspirations. 

Many young adults are raised with the notion that by a certain age, they should have a clear career path, financial stability, and a settled personal life. 

However, the reality of navigating these complex areas often leads to uncertainty and stress. 

The pressure to conform to these societal norms can create a sense of urgency and panic. Tha would be pushing individuals into a quarter life crisis.

The age at which a quarter life crisis hits can also be influenced by cultural and economic factors. 

In some cultures, there is a strong emphasis on achieving specific milestones by a certain age. Which can also intensify the pressure. 

Economic conditions, such as job market fluctuations and the rising cost of living, can further complicate this period. 

For example, struggling to find stable employment or managing student loan debt can exacerbate feelings of instability and frustration.

It’s important to recognize that a quarter life crisis is not confined to a specific age but rather a stage of life marked by significant transitions and decisions. 

The timing and duration of this crisis can vary widely among individuals. 

Understanding that this period is a normal part of personal development can help alleviate some of the stress and anxiety associated with it.

From a sports psychologist’s perspective, the focus is on helping individuals accept their thoughts and feelings during this transitional period and commit to actions that align with their core values. 

By embracing the uncertainty and viewing it as an opportunity for growth, young adults can navigate their quarter life crisis more effectively and with greater resilience.

In summary, a quarter life crisis typically occurs in the mid-20s to early 30s, driven by significant life transitions and societal pressures. 

Recognizing the commonality and timing of this experience can help individuals approach it with a sense of understanding and proactive strategies to manage the associated challenges.

Ways to deal with a quarter life crisis

Dealing with a quarter life crisis can be challenging, but there are effective strategies to help you get unstuck. 

Here are some practical ways, incorporating principles from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT):

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT):

ACT is a powerful approach that helps you accept your thoughts and feelings rather than fighting them. 

By focusing on what truly matters to you and taking committed action, you can navigate through a quarter life crisis with greater ease. 

Techniques like mindfulness can help you stay present and grounded, while values-based living encourages you to align your actions with what you care about most. 

For example, instead of ruminating on career dissatisfaction, ACT would guide you to accept these feelings, identify what you truly value in a career, and take steps towards finding or creating a job that aligns with those values.

Setting Realistic Goals:

It’s important to set realistic and achievable goals. 

Break down your larger goals into smaller, manageable steps. 

This not only makes them less overwhelming but also allows you to celebrate small wins along the way. 

Each small achievement builds confidence and momentum, helping you move forward. 

For instance, if you’re unhappy in your current job, set a goal to research new career paths, update your resume, or reach out to professionals in fields of interest. 

Each step forward is progress, even if it feels small.

Seeking Support:

Don’t go through this alone. 

Seek support from mentors, coaches, or therapists who can provide guidance and perspective. 

Building a support network of friends and family can also be invaluable. 

Surrounding yourself with people who understand and support your journey can make a huge difference. 

Engage in open conversations about your feelings and experiences. 

Sometimes, simply sharing your struggles with someone who listens empathetically can alleviate a lot of the stress and loneliness associated with a quarter life crisis.

Staying Active:

Physical activity is a great way to boost your mental health. 

Incorporate sports and exercise into your routine to relieve stress and improve your mood. 

Whether it’s running, yoga, or joining a local sports team, staying active can help you feel better both physically and mentally. 

Exercise releases endorphins, which are natural mood lifters, and it also provides a constructive way to channel your energy. 

Additionally, participating in group sports can foster a sense of community and belonging, which is crucial during times of personal crisis.

Embracing Change and Uncertainty:

Change and uncertainty are inevitable parts of life. 

Developing a positive mindset towards these can help you navigate your quarter life crisis more effectively. 

Embrace new experiences, learn from challenges, and view this period as a time for personal growth. 

Remember, it’s okay not to have everything figured out!

Life is a journey, and each step, including the missteps, contributes to your growth and development. 

Try to reframe uncertainty as a space for potential and opportunity rather than a source of fear.

Engaging in Self-Reflection:

Take time to reflect on your experiences, values, and goals. 

Journaling can be a helpful tool for this. 

Write about what you’re feeling, what you want to achieve, and what steps you can take to get there. 

Self-reflection helps you gain clarity and understand yourself better, which is essential for making informed decisions. 

By regularly engaging in self-reflection, you can track your progress, recognize patterns, and adjust your actions to stay aligned with your true desires.

Exploring New Interests and Hobbies:

Use this period as an opportunity to explore new interests and hobbies. 

Engaging in activities that you enjoy can bring a sense of fulfillment and help you discover new passions. 

Whether it’s painting, hiking, cooking, or learning a new language, trying something new can invigorate your spirit and provide a break from the stress of everyday life. 

Plus, it can lead to new friendships and networks, further enriching your support system.

Financial Planning and Management:

Financial stress is a common aspect of a quarter life crisis. 

Take control of your finances by creating a budget, setting financial goals, and seeking advice from financial planners if necessary. 

Having a clear financial plan can reduce anxiety and give you a sense of control over your future. 

Start small by tracking your expenses, identifying areas where you can save, and setting realistic financial goals like building an emergency fund or paying off debt.

Pursuing Professional Development:

Invest in your professional growth by seeking additional training, certifications, or education in areas that interest you. 

This can open up new career opportunities and increase your confidence. 

Attend workshops, take online courses, or even consider going back to school if it aligns with your career aspirations. 

Professional development not only enhances your skills but also keeps you engaged and motivated.

Practicing Self-Compassion:

Be kind to yourself during this challenging time. 

Acknowledge that it’s okay to feel uncertain and to struggle. 

Practice self-compassion by treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer a friend in a similar situation. 

Remember, it’s okay to make mistakes and to take time to figure things out. 

Self-compassion reduces stress and helps you maintain a positive outlook.

Conclusion

A quarter life crisis can feel overwhelming, but it’s also an opportunity for growth and self-discovery. 

By understanding what it is, recognizing when it typically occurs, and using strategies like ACT, setting realistic goals, seeking support, staying active, and embracing change, you can get unstuck and move forward with confidence.

For more guidance and resources, consider joining the Success Stories Membership

This platform offers training on how to achieve high performance and can provide the support you need to navigate your quarter life crisis successfully. 

Remember, you’re not alone!

And with the right tools and mindset, you can turn this challenging time into a powerful period of growth and transformation.